Lessons Learnt

Without the risk of sounding too cliched, I think this summer has really taught me a few vital lessons in life. It's only when you really push yourself out of your boundaries and comfort zone (or sometimes being pushed is more prominant) that you discover more about yourself. So - this is a post summarizing such discoveries.

1// Never leave valuables in a tent. Especially at a festival. Ever
2// Don't take yourself or others too seriously.
3// Be completely open to new places and new things, you never know where it can take you: say yes more!
4// Be true to yourself and you'll have nothing to regret.
5// Leave bad thoughts behind; learn to forgive and forget (or at least forgive) and accept that people are only human afterall
6// Understand that the little things you do can actually affect others massively; tread the ground of human emotions very carefully
7// Material things really don't matter in the bigger scheme of things. (But they're still nice of course) Money isn't everything
8// Get out of the UK; (or at least Yate...) the World is huge and full of beauty and beautiful people...routine life is pretty damn boring in comparison
9// Respect yourself and accept your flaws. Nobody's perfect no?
10// Leave regrets behind - just see it as another lesson learnt

Ok, lame list over.
:)

Jack FM > other radio stations

Currently sat in my PJ's in the conservatory, chilling out and listening to Jack FM (the best radio station by far) when I should really be showering and such. Loving the old school tunes on Jack; other radio stations really need to play more variety rather than repeating the same old chart music...there are only so many times that that I can stomach Pitbull's voice in a day. I don't think I'm in the minority on this one, either.

Off to Bath town today for a spot of day-time shopping, probably some coffee (it's usually inavoidable when I'm with my friend Vicki, such coffee whores), then for a well-needed night out! My friend Maria has just moved into her new house there so it's the perfect excuse for a few drinks and to discover new places to go out (seeing as I usually just stick to the same spots in Bristol).

I've been super busy since my last post; this summer has been eventful to say the least. When I have more time I'll post a few photos from my interrailing trip around Europe. It was a trip I'll never forget, especially thanks to my friend Ruth, who was the perfect travelling companion and without whom I would've been thoroughly lost. Public transport is hard enough in the UK, so navigating our way through Europe proved to be a tad tricky at times. Even so, an amazing experience and something I'd recommend for everyone to do at least the once.

Definitely running out of time to get ready now so I'd better scurry on. In the meantime, here's a forgotten tune for you to enjoy...it sort of sums up my general state of mind right now. No change there then!

Sweet nostalgia

Having spent the last couple of hours looking through pictures from my childhood (that is, up until the awkward teenage ugly-duckling years, which I tackfully skipped over as quick as possible), I am feeling somewhat nostalgic for the simple years where I had no cares in life. I think I'm becoming more and more paranoid about the fact that I am approaching 21; I feel like I should have some sort of life plan, but in standard Katie fashion I have no idea of the career I want to go into. Sometimes I get these vicious little bursts of worry that I'll never know, and that I'll forever be polishing plates at the hotel I'm currently working in. Life seems to be passing by so quickly, I feel like sometimes I can't keep up with it. I'm stuck in the past - take me back to the Nineties!?

These were some of my favourites of me as a child, and some of me with my brothers and cousins. It's weird to think that I can't remember these days, yet my parents remember it so clearly.

I came across quite a lot of much older photos of my parents and grandparents and my auntie. I literally love looking through old pictures, I find it so interesting. It's almost like you're looking at a different person altogether...for instance the pictures of my mum - before she had me, she wasn't even my mum, or even not a mum at all! It's pretty fascinating. Maybe I'm still in my post-night out delirious state of mind, but even so: here are a few more of my favourites.

From top: My Auntie and my Mum; my Nan, Mum and Auntie

From left: My Auntie, Nan and Great Auntie Thelma

My nana looking beach-bod perfect!

My Auntie as a bride...she looks so demure!

Why is it that old photos look so much better than the modern-day equivalent? I don't think anything can beat vintage photography, I find it so much more expressionate. It's quite funny that these photos are so natural, yet if they were taken today they'd probably be seen as 'try-hard' as the trend for vintage is ever-growing, making it more of an issue of appearing 'cool' rather than capturing the moment.

Does anyone else have any golden oldie photography to share? I'd love to see!

7 day countdown begins

Festival season is impending, and fast!

Beach Break is now a mere week away, and I haven't even had time to think about it yet (a repeat of last year's massively rushed Reading preparation = packing at 7am in the morning). I'm not even sure who's headlining to be honest - all I remember is Tinie Tempah, Nero, Magnetic Man, Newton Faulkner and White Lies.

A quick print-screen job from the BB homepage shows that this is the final act line-up!

The acts I'm most excited about are definitely Tinie Tempah, Example, Newton Faulkner and...hold up, where is Nero on this list? I swear I didn't make that one up...fml.

I think my festival-appropriate wardrobe is adequate enough as it is, without the need for traipsing around the high-street (why do I say this as if it's such a drag?). I'm thinking I'll most likely live in my high-waisted denim shorts and wear them with fuss-free tops/shirts (avoiding even writing the fateful double 

-barrelled word that begins with a type of precipitation and ends with a garment worn over an outfit in order to avoid such evil types of precipitation...mmm you know what I mean. Or at least I do). 

Even so...I did manage to just spend £20 on Tescos' F&F clothing on their website. I wasn't really expecting much from the clothing - initially, I was only drawn in by the fact that ALL garments were half price, and being the stingy person that I am, I thought I'd take a quick look. 

I was pleasantly surprised with what I found; I am a bit of a snob when it comes down to supermarket clothes shopping, and although a lot of the clothing left a lot to be desired, by the end of my search, Tesco came up trumps by offering me festival-chic at half the price. 

I saved a total of £18 on my purchases - which included two basic burn-out tees in pastel-green and marl grey, a gorgeous sheer camisole top with ethnic-inspired print, and a structured across-body bag just the right size for festival needs. The 50% flash sale runs until midnight Saturday - take a lookie, quick!

Work, work, work (and a bit of play)

Haven't blogged in a while thanks to a) an extreme lack of interesting things to write about, and b) working like a lunatic over the last couple of weeks...apologises for this!

I've been very thankful that my days off this week have coincided with some glorious sunshine, and as always I have made the most of it by basking beneath the rays in my garden alll day! I'm looking considerably more tanned (wooo), and I'm hoping this weather continues throughout June - particularly for Beach Break pleeeease! - Which is only 2 weeks away! Excited!

My social life has suffered in recent times because of excessive hours at work, as I mentioned before, but last night I saw Two Door Cinema Club at Bristol O2 Academy with a few friends...and they were fantastique! I didn't know all of the songs, admittedly, but they are definitely a great live band and I can't wait to see them again at Reading Festival later this summer.

Two Door Cinema Club - What You Know <3

I had a mass clear out of my home wardrobe the other day - I think I must've banished about three-quarters of my wardrobe (Shock! Horror!), which is a great achievement for me as I am quite the hoarder. Anyway, the garments were sorted into piles for ebay selling (which I haven't been able to do yet thanks to stupid verification codes, pfft), charity shop donations (i.e. clothes not even worth attempting to sell), potential-for-updating/customising, and ...I think that's it actually.

BUT. I failed a bit. After taking my bag full to the charity shop, I ended up buying a few new items...oops. In all fairness though, they are lovelylovely, oh-so cheap and oh-so worth it.

[01] Charidee shop bargains: black crop top, £3?, red sleeveless shirt, £2, Denim shorts, £3.50

[02] Close up...note the little rosebud detailing on the straps

[03] Back view of shorts...selling on ebay because they don't fit me:(

Still need to transport a whole load of clothes back from Southampton, but hopefully I should just about have room for all of my clobber in the one wardrobe! Score...

The guilt of sitting all day is setting in now, so I'm gonna head out for a well overdue run.

So fresh and so clean

In a state of confusion as today is the official start of my summer. That's right, all my deadlines are over and done with, and as of today I am free as a bird! Which at the moment is the weirdest feeling ever. So what to do now? To kick off the start of my 4-month (!) long break from uni, on the agenda today (once I drag myself out of bed) includes:
   

[01] Look for birthday presents for various special people

[02] Research holiday destinations for girls' summer holiday

[03] Clean my absolute tip of a room

[04] Buy Beach Break tickets and train tickets home

[05] Redesign my blog

[06] Go for a (long overdue) run

[07] Possibly do some online shopping (in need of new trainers, clothes and books/DVDs/music...basically, everything

To sum up my past week...it has consisted of a lot of work-fuelled boredom, procrastination, and not a lot of fresh air. That excludes last friday's celebrations of the Royal Wedding, of course, which was basically a great excuse to drink all day. Watched the wedding in bed, then attended the Newcombe Royal Rave; I burnt out by 11pm though so had to depart to bed, lame ey! Some pictures:

[01] Bikini top (Primark) - finally found one that looks half decent on me, whey

[02] 30th Apr - hangover fuel, Irn Bru and Tumblr

[03] Mountains of books/magazines forming on my desk

[04] My only form of Vitamin D whilst being chained to laptop

[05] Harry is a certified Hottie, no doubt about it. Source

[06] Will and Kate...she looked so perfect. Source

[07] Cute! Source

Celebrated end of 2nd year last night at - wait for it - Oceana. Not exactly my fave place but excluding the extortionate drink prices it was actually a really fun night. I admit, I did miss the cheese room. I didn't, however, miss the creepy guys. Pictures to come soon :).

Life as a cynic

[01] Source

[02] Source

[03] Source

[04] Source

[05] Source

[06] Source

[07] Source

[08] Source

[09] Source

[10] Source

Sunday soundtrack

The songs I've recently become obsessed with sort of defines my schizophrenic music tastes. I hate it when people ask me what type of music I'm into; seriously, is there anyone who only likes music of a certain genre? I couldn't define my music tastes, although my general observation of current chart music is that it is somewhat...dire. However, I was confused yet delighted at how this oldie recently reached number 2 in the UK, apparently because a guy sang it on Britain's Got Talent. Ignoring that, here is the original:

Aaaand the next two have literally been on repeat in my internal music player for the last week. Such feel good summer tunes, almost good enough to put me in a half-human mood on the way into work at 6.10am. Almost, yet not quite. Good try Mann/Wretch32.

Also have a fresh obsession with The Pretty Reckless (i.e. Taylor Momsen's band). If you don't like the girl, don't prejudge the music before actually giving it a listen; her voice is a lot better than most actresses-turned-rockstars. She definitely puts co-Gossip Girl Leighton Meister to shame. This song in particular makes me want to get extentions/bleach my hair/have koala eyes/lose 2 stone i.e. be Momsen. Shit video, but yeah...close your eyes or something.

In other news, today was day five (of five) on the breakfast shift, and I can safely say that I survived the ordeal with only minor scuffering of my mental wellbeing and general sanity. I'm putting the massive moodswings down to severe sleep deprivation, and hoping that I'll be a little less suicidal after sleeping for a whole day or two. But then again, I haven't started my uni work and all-in-all have about 10,000 words to write in 8 days. Fucking brill. 

*Continues mental breakdown*

Food. So much food

This week, my body seems to think it's in starvation mode and hence keeps sending my brain all these signals to eat everything and anything in sight. So that is what I've been doing, of course.

Today in particular has brought with it joy to my stomach and taste buds. In order to maximize energy and motivation levels throughout the breakfast shift (I don't ever remember a time when I've had to get up at 5.30am. Ever.), my workmate Becci made us each a Nutella hot chocolate.

Yes, you heard right. Nutella. Hot. Chocolate. To say it was good would be an understatement. This masterpiece of a beverage is on par with Brother's lemon cider - and anyone who knows me well enough will know that this is quite a statement for me to make.

Unfortunately I didn't stick around during the production process, but I know for sure that a lotta heaped spoonfuls of Nutella were involved, along with hot milk and plenty of frothy topping.

To counteract the naughtiness of today's consumptive excessiveness, I shall be going for a run with my good'ol chum Maria very shortly (three days of running in a row! Oh how eager I am)...followed by a cider in the pub. Defeats the point a bit, doesn't it? Ah well!

I don't care if Monday's blue

I was pretty darn tired after another breakfast shift today (morning seriously does not agree with my system), so spent the afternoon led on my bed reading up about the rising University fees that are coming into action from 2012...fun, right?

So, according to the Guardian online, practically every university in the UK is raising their fees to the maximum amount - which is £9,000/yr - despite the government's previous claims that the average fee would be £7,500/yr.

It is practically a given that the prestigious universities on the top of the league table (i.e. Oxbridge, and the red-brick uni's) would charge the highest possible amount, to avoid the fateful label of 'bargain basement' higher education. But it seems that all universities are worried about how the fees they choose will reflect on their reputation as an institute, with uni's from the lower end of the league table also choosing the £9k cap. Which, in return, makes the future education system look pretty bleak.

I feel like I am being wholly hypocritical in saying what I'm about to say...but I'm gonna say it anyway. My degree would definitely meet the criteria of a typical "Mickey mouse" course, and such a course that these fee hikes are the result of.

They are trying to cut down on the numbers of students looking to gain a vocational qualification at degree level, and in consequence of the extortionate fees, I have no doubt that such vocational subjects will be cut from university prospectus' in future - mainly due to insufficient funding, most likely, and waning numbers of students willing to pay such huge amounts of money.

I know for certain that had I been 3 years younger and looking into going to uni bearing in mind the rising fees, I wouldn't have done so. Or, at least, I wouldn't have chosen my current course, because in my opinion my course is definitely not worth even the 'bargainous' three-and-a-bit thousand a year I'm paying for it at the moment. Vocational courses are best learnt 'on the job', rather than at university, because either way you'll never get anywhere without work experience and placements for such courses, disregarding the credibility of a degree completely.

The higher education system seems to be in tatters, or it's definitely heading there. Although I don't in any way agree with the rising course fees, I do think that something needs to change about the university system in the UK. Businesses and work places should offer more to those looking to gain vocational qualifications, whilst universities should focus on promoting those degrees that specifically require a high level of teaching, that can only be given at university standard.

Perhaps, rather ironically, the future of higher education is looking towards the past, where classic research degrees and subjects thrive over other courses. Either way, it won't particularly be affecting me directly so I guess I should be happy to have avoided the whole conundrum. I do really feel sorry for the younger generation though; uni has solely become an issue of money and class. At this rate, our generation will literally be forever in debt.

Hurrah for sun!

 It looks as though Summer has come early again this year (If I'm right in saying that the same thing happened last year? I feel like it did anyway) and I am absolutely loving basking in the sun as much as physically possible, or at least as much as my work hours allow.

I've gotten back into the swing of work, my body has almost acclimatized (wrong word, I am aware) to the frantic and massively stressful conditions that come part-in-parcel with working in a hotel, and to the crazy long hours with minimal (if any) breaks. Yesterday they put my overt willingness to work (slash my desperation for money) to good use by putting me on the breakfast-dinner shift, otherwise known as the "student shift". Waking up before 7am was a bit of a shock to the system, especially after a 12am finish the night before, but it wasn't as bad as I remember back in the Christmas break. The breakfast shift was 8am-1pm, which allowed for a few hours of sunbathing before returning for the evening 6pm-1am stint. 

Despite the obvious downsides, there are a lot of perks that come with the job. The hotel I work for is part of the Exclusive Hotels chain and has a Michellin star, which of course means that the food is uh-may-zing. I definitely take advantage of any leftover meals (by this I do not mean scraps of food leftover by guests, I'm not that disgusting) and yesterday my sweet tooth was left more than satisfied by a leftover plum tart pudding. The petit-fours are a personal favourite, too, and luckily for me the guests never seem to manage them (not surprising really, after three or four courses plus coffee and wine). 

If I didn't constantly have my somewhat blinkered work goggles on, I would consider the Manor quintessentially grand and beautiful, charming and, altogether, the perfect English countryside retreat (I am seriously running the risk of sounding like some sort of brochure but nevermind!). Located in the quaint village of Castle Combe - otherwise known as the village where Stardust was filmed, and labelled the "prettiest village in England" - as I drive down the hill towards the centre of the village, it is truely like I'm stepping back in time, or perhaps transporting myself a few hundred miles into a rural French village. 

There is also the sociable side of work. Getting to know other employees from different backgrounds, and who've come from all over the World to work at the hotel, is really interesting and takes away some of the pain of polishing plates for hours on end! 

And, of course, money forms a large part of my motives to work! Hoping that I'll be paid soon, seeing as my current account is now into negative figures (I didn't have enough in there for my phone bill so they've charged me an extra £10...sob). 

Tonight I have an exciting evening of.... nothing, planned. I seriously hate not having my term times correspond with my friends' :( Bro is having friends over, I shall be banished to my room. Joy...

Tattoo temptation

I've been wanting a tattoo for quite a while, so I think it's only right that I do something about it and finally bite the bullet. I've therefore spent the last day doodling potential designs, and thinking about the bodily location for such designs. Last night I actually dreamt I had three wrist tattoos...I can't remember exactly what they were like, but I tried my very best to delve into my memory bank and recreate the designs via paper and pen.

[01] Tatt doodles

So here was the result, surrounded by other designs that took my fancy. The ones that made their appearance in my dream include the row of little card suits, the one underneath (which I don't particularly like, but nonetheless it looked good last night) and the swirly/dotty sun design above. 


Then there is the infinity sign. I've always been partial to the odd infinity sign. This partiality might even stem back as far as those fun-filled maths lessons back in sixth form. 


I've also liked the idea of having a 'King of Clubs' type design for quite a while... mainly because my name begins with a K and because I like the clover design. However, to sound deep and philosophical I have googled the meaning of the 'King of Clubs' and Wikipedia came up trumps with this little description:

"The King of clubs has the meaning of good character and loyalty and the realization of ideals. The card is said to be one who has great power, but one who is not aware of this, and is outwardly cheerful but inwardly reserved."


So the dilemma continues, and as ever, my indecisiveness is winning.

[02] Tattoo designs found on Google

[03] Heart peace design; source

[04] Infinity/heart wrist tattoos; source

Massive urge to splurge...

Uh-oh.

Today I discovered Yayer. If I had any money, today would also be the day in which I spend it all. I think I'm in love with about 90% of the clothes on this site, it all looks so lovely and cool and eclectic and I want it all in my wardrobe. Please.

Here are some of the beauties that are top on my lust-list:

[01] Checkmate Cardigan

[02] Garden Party Blazer

[03] Art School Drape Shirt

[04] Leopard Love Oversized Shirt

[05] Over Dyed Bead Crop

Gonna have to hope for a hella lotta shifts at work over Easter...my wardrobe will have to wait until then. 

Loving the idea of dressing for summer - pics on Tumblr of girls in shorts and crop tops is making me want sun, pronto. Summer is the season for casual dressing, which suits me and my ever-lacking ability to dress up. Definitely going to whack some tie-dye fun out and start customising vest tops - really love the bead detailing on the last image. Hurrrrry, summer!

10 Reasons

Anyone who has been graced with my presence (joke obv) in the last week or so will know that I have become exponentially closer to quitting uni...or closer to the mind-set of quitting, at least.
This term, or maybe this whole year in general, has resulted in my huge lack of motivation that has seen me spend far too much time doing everything but working. I know I'm not the only one feeling like this, which really gets me thinking - why the actual hell are we choosing to get into £25k+ dept for a course that we are getting no enjoyment out of?
I don't mean to seem like a massive emo but it's literally got to the point where I cannot stand it any more. Uni is supposed to be the time of my life, and although I enjoy the social side of my existence here, it's not enough. So that brings me to my fun-filled top 10 reasons why my course is pointless and hence my reasoning behind wanting to quit. Please enjoy without feeling the need to slit your wrists.

1. I currently have 9 hours of lectures/seminars a week, the majority of which are completely pointless and subsequently are spent with me asking myself why I bothered to turn up in the first place. 
2. I do not learn anything worthwhile. Ever. Everything I have taught myself in the last year and a half of being here has been courtesy of books and internet - not the teaching. So why exactly am I paying to teach myself? 
3. Doing a writing course is pointless in itself. My writing style hasn't exactly changed, I am writing at the same quality as I was in 6th form. In my opinion, 6th form was more difficult than uni, the workload was more extensive and the teaching so much better - all without having to pay £3000+ a year for it!
4. We are constantly told that it doesn't matter what we do in uni, it's what we do outside that really counts. To sum it up, what my lecturers are telling me is that I could've just applied for internships and work experience after 6th form, without going to uni, as this is what employers look for above all else. Great.
5. Along with this, we are constantly told that print journalism is dying a slow, painful death thanks to the not-so-fantastic world of online journalism and blogging. Therefore the jobs in the industry we were hoping to go into are disappearing - fast. 
6. I know it's all a part of adult life, but the idea of having to work your way upwards in your future job annoys me. I wouldn't be so worried if it didn't ring true for this field more than any other. Obviously I'm aware that I won't be writing for a mainstream consumer magazine straight after uni, but to think that thousands of other students will be looking for similar jobs after graduating (from better universities, might I add) is pretty disheartening. 
7. I don't particularly feel passionately about the fashion industry. I enjoy it - I buy into it (though not so much now I'm on a strict charity shop budget) - but I can't exactly see myself working in it. This was admittedly a misjudgement on my part. Should've just stuck to a bloody normal course afterall.
8. I no longer enjoy writing, full stop. Bad, bad sign. 
9. We always get told different ways of writing/pitching etc by different lecturers. They contradict one another to the point where I'm so confused that I just go ahead and do my own thing anyway.
10. The course in general could be described as disorganised, 'bitty' and...well, just a bit of a mess really. Our assignments often don't match up to what we've been 'taught' (at least for one of the units anyway). If there was a better structure then perhaps I'd know where I was for once.

I'm not sure what is keeping me here at the moment. Maybe the fact that I've paid for two years already and only have a year until I finish should be incentive enough. I just hope that next year is a bit better than this year has been; choosing my final year options last week was a push in the right direction for my waning motivation and positivity, but now I seem to have returned back to my previous depressive mind-set...oh, the joys o' uni.

Catching a bargain

Broke the Sunday tradition of doing sweet F.A. by leaving the house before 11am to venture out to University of Southampton's campus for Judy's Affordable Vintage Fashion Fair, the UK's leading vintage fair hailing a shopping extravaganza to 23 cities across the country.

The fair wasn't as big as I imagined and from the images I'd previously seen, but even so there was a good atmosphere, everyone bonded by their love of all things vintage. Stalls featured everything from vintage fashion, to fashion magazines from the 20's and beyond, to unique upcycled jewellery bearing Polly Pocket toys as charms.

I successfully restricted myself by only purchasing a sweet little floral-print bag, Rayban style sunglasses and a kitsch scissor necklace; however, if it wasn't for pesky rent money worries I could've (and would've) bought a whole lot more.

[01] Judy's Vintage Fair

[02] Collection of purchases (Steph's and mine)

[03] Scissor necklace, £3

[04] Necklaces

[05] Playing about with the Olympus...Steph's headscarf

Hometown Glory

The past week has seen me hop-skipping back and forth between home and Southampton, twice! - quite a record, especially considering I hadn't gone home since the Christmas break previously.

As every student will agree, home comforts are literally the best thing. Thanks to my mum's knack of over-stocking at Christmas, there were still chocolates lying about at every glance...these I took full advantage of whilst I could (I hardly ever have tasty snacks to hand in Soton). Tea and biscuits and delicious home-cooked meals and puddings and plentiful stocks of every type of food imaginable; my stomach had not seen such action since Christmas. And, of course, it was lovely to see my family again, and being in a warm, cosy house was definitely a novelty.

I decided to dye my hair 'naturally' with lemon juice whilst I was at home. After researching into how to naturally bleach your hair, wikihow and ehow managed to convince me that lemon juice was the way forward.  It basically involved me juicing a lemon into a jug, dipping my hair into the jug and combing it through the lengths of my hair, then sitting outside in the sun for half an hour...by which time, my hair was as dry as straw. I washed it out, as advised, followed by a lot of deep conditioner. I haven't noticed a grand difference, but apparently it works gradually anyway...which I don't really understand, but I guess I'll have to wait and see.

My camera had a disastrous tumble the other week (I swear it wasn't my fault, it was the bad spirits lurking in my room that did it), which meant that the lens broke. I thought I was gonna have to fork out a couple of hundred on a new one, but luckily my brother found one for around £60 on ebay, and it arrived whilst I was home. I put it to good use and took a load of pictures...312, in fact.

[01] Close-up portrait

[02] Maria, vintage photoshoot for uni

[03] Grand piano <3

[04] Silverware (testing out the zoooom & focus)

[05] Photoshoot location...lovely countryside

I was impressed with the lens, it's so much better than my old one so perhaps that'll give me the incentive to use my camera more. As much as I love it, it gets neglected rather a lot.

In other news, I would please please like to own the following!:

[06] Batman tights, needs no explanation

[07] Baby pet fawn!

[08] Charlotte Olympia fruit shoes! Love!

[09] These nails.

Unfortunately I think only two of the four items are somewhat achieveable for me to own. My budget doesn't extend enough to cater for £870.01 (why the extra penny?) shoes, and nor does my conscience cater for illegal pet fawns.