Sunday soundtrack

The songs I've recently become obsessed with sort of defines my schizophrenic music tastes. I hate it when people ask me what type of music I'm into; seriously, is there anyone who only likes music of a certain genre? I couldn't define my music tastes, although my general observation of current chart music is that it is somewhat...dire. However, I was confused yet delighted at how this oldie recently reached number 2 in the UK, apparently because a guy sang it on Britain's Got Talent. Ignoring that, here is the original:

Aaaand the next two have literally been on repeat in my internal music player for the last week. Such feel good summer tunes, almost good enough to put me in a half-human mood on the way into work at 6.10am. Almost, yet not quite. Good try Mann/Wretch32.

Also have a fresh obsession with The Pretty Reckless (i.e. Taylor Momsen's band). If you don't like the girl, don't prejudge the music before actually giving it a listen; her voice is a lot better than most actresses-turned-rockstars. She definitely puts co-Gossip Girl Leighton Meister to shame. This song in particular makes me want to get extentions/bleach my hair/have koala eyes/lose 2 stone i.e. be Momsen. Shit video, but yeah...close your eyes or something.

In other news, today was day five (of five) on the breakfast shift, and I can safely say that I survived the ordeal with only minor scuffering of my mental wellbeing and general sanity. I'm putting the massive moodswings down to severe sleep deprivation, and hoping that I'll be a little less suicidal after sleeping for a whole day or two. But then again, I haven't started my uni work and all-in-all have about 10,000 words to write in 8 days. Fucking brill. 

*Continues mental breakdown*

Food. So much food

This week, my body seems to think it's in starvation mode and hence keeps sending my brain all these signals to eat everything and anything in sight. So that is what I've been doing, of course.

Today in particular has brought with it joy to my stomach and taste buds. In order to maximize energy and motivation levels throughout the breakfast shift (I don't ever remember a time when I've had to get up at 5.30am. Ever.), my workmate Becci made us each a Nutella hot chocolate.

Yes, you heard right. Nutella. Hot. Chocolate. To say it was good would be an understatement. This masterpiece of a beverage is on par with Brother's lemon cider - and anyone who knows me well enough will know that this is quite a statement for me to make.

Unfortunately I didn't stick around during the production process, but I know for sure that a lotta heaped spoonfuls of Nutella were involved, along with hot milk and plenty of frothy topping.

To counteract the naughtiness of today's consumptive excessiveness, I shall be going for a run with my good'ol chum Maria very shortly (three days of running in a row! Oh how eager I am)...followed by a cider in the pub. Defeats the point a bit, doesn't it? Ah well!

I don't care if Monday's blue

I was pretty darn tired after another breakfast shift today (morning seriously does not agree with my system), so spent the afternoon led on my bed reading up about the rising University fees that are coming into action from 2012...fun, right?

So, according to the Guardian online, practically every university in the UK is raising their fees to the maximum amount - which is £9,000/yr - despite the government's previous claims that the average fee would be £7,500/yr.

It is practically a given that the prestigious universities on the top of the league table (i.e. Oxbridge, and the red-brick uni's) would charge the highest possible amount, to avoid the fateful label of 'bargain basement' higher education. But it seems that all universities are worried about how the fees they choose will reflect on their reputation as an institute, with uni's from the lower end of the league table also choosing the £9k cap. Which, in return, makes the future education system look pretty bleak.

I feel like I am being wholly hypocritical in saying what I'm about to say...but I'm gonna say it anyway. My degree would definitely meet the criteria of a typical "Mickey mouse" course, and such a course that these fee hikes are the result of.

They are trying to cut down on the numbers of students looking to gain a vocational qualification at degree level, and in consequence of the extortionate fees, I have no doubt that such vocational subjects will be cut from university prospectus' in future - mainly due to insufficient funding, most likely, and waning numbers of students willing to pay such huge amounts of money.

I know for certain that had I been 3 years younger and looking into going to uni bearing in mind the rising fees, I wouldn't have done so. Or, at least, I wouldn't have chosen my current course, because in my opinion my course is definitely not worth even the 'bargainous' three-and-a-bit thousand a year I'm paying for it at the moment. Vocational courses are best learnt 'on the job', rather than at university, because either way you'll never get anywhere without work experience and placements for such courses, disregarding the credibility of a degree completely.

The higher education system seems to be in tatters, or it's definitely heading there. Although I don't in any way agree with the rising course fees, I do think that something needs to change about the university system in the UK. Businesses and work places should offer more to those looking to gain vocational qualifications, whilst universities should focus on promoting those degrees that specifically require a high level of teaching, that can only be given at university standard.

Perhaps, rather ironically, the future of higher education is looking towards the past, where classic research degrees and subjects thrive over other courses. Either way, it won't particularly be affecting me directly so I guess I should be happy to have avoided the whole conundrum. I do really feel sorry for the younger generation though; uni has solely become an issue of money and class. At this rate, our generation will literally be forever in debt.

Hurrah for sun!

 It looks as though Summer has come early again this year (If I'm right in saying that the same thing happened last year? I feel like it did anyway) and I am absolutely loving basking in the sun as much as physically possible, or at least as much as my work hours allow.

I've gotten back into the swing of work, my body has almost acclimatized (wrong word, I am aware) to the frantic and massively stressful conditions that come part-in-parcel with working in a hotel, and to the crazy long hours with minimal (if any) breaks. Yesterday they put my overt willingness to work (slash my desperation for money) to good use by putting me on the breakfast-dinner shift, otherwise known as the "student shift". Waking up before 7am was a bit of a shock to the system, especially after a 12am finish the night before, but it wasn't as bad as I remember back in the Christmas break. The breakfast shift was 8am-1pm, which allowed for a few hours of sunbathing before returning for the evening 6pm-1am stint. 

Despite the obvious downsides, there are a lot of perks that come with the job. The hotel I work for is part of the Exclusive Hotels chain and has a Michellin star, which of course means that the food is uh-may-zing. I definitely take advantage of any leftover meals (by this I do not mean scraps of food leftover by guests, I'm not that disgusting) and yesterday my sweet tooth was left more than satisfied by a leftover plum tart pudding. The petit-fours are a personal favourite, too, and luckily for me the guests never seem to manage them (not surprising really, after three or four courses plus coffee and wine). 

If I didn't constantly have my somewhat blinkered work goggles on, I would consider the Manor quintessentially grand and beautiful, charming and, altogether, the perfect English countryside retreat (I am seriously running the risk of sounding like some sort of brochure but nevermind!). Located in the quaint village of Castle Combe - otherwise known as the village where Stardust was filmed, and labelled the "prettiest village in England" - as I drive down the hill towards the centre of the village, it is truely like I'm stepping back in time, or perhaps transporting myself a few hundred miles into a rural French village. 

There is also the sociable side of work. Getting to know other employees from different backgrounds, and who've come from all over the World to work at the hotel, is really interesting and takes away some of the pain of polishing plates for hours on end! 

And, of course, money forms a large part of my motives to work! Hoping that I'll be paid soon, seeing as my current account is now into negative figures (I didn't have enough in there for my phone bill so they've charged me an extra £10...sob). 

Tonight I have an exciting evening of.... nothing, planned. I seriously hate not having my term times correspond with my friends' :( Bro is having friends over, I shall be banished to my room. Joy...

Tattoo temptation

I've been wanting a tattoo for quite a while, so I think it's only right that I do something about it and finally bite the bullet. I've therefore spent the last day doodling potential designs, and thinking about the bodily location for such designs. Last night I actually dreamt I had three wrist tattoos...I can't remember exactly what they were like, but I tried my very best to delve into my memory bank and recreate the designs via paper and pen.

[01] Tatt doodles

So here was the result, surrounded by other designs that took my fancy. The ones that made their appearance in my dream include the row of little card suits, the one underneath (which I don't particularly like, but nonetheless it looked good last night) and the swirly/dotty sun design above. 


Then there is the infinity sign. I've always been partial to the odd infinity sign. This partiality might even stem back as far as those fun-filled maths lessons back in sixth form. 


I've also liked the idea of having a 'King of Clubs' type design for quite a while... mainly because my name begins with a K and because I like the clover design. However, to sound deep and philosophical I have googled the meaning of the 'King of Clubs' and Wikipedia came up trumps with this little description:

"The King of clubs has the meaning of good character and loyalty and the realization of ideals. The card is said to be one who has great power, but one who is not aware of this, and is outwardly cheerful but inwardly reserved."


So the dilemma continues, and as ever, my indecisiveness is winning.

[02] Tattoo designs found on Google

[03] Heart peace design; source

[04] Infinity/heart wrist tattoos; source

Massive urge to splurge...

Uh-oh.

Today I discovered Yayer. If I had any money, today would also be the day in which I spend it all. I think I'm in love with about 90% of the clothes on this site, it all looks so lovely and cool and eclectic and I want it all in my wardrobe. Please.

Here are some of the beauties that are top on my lust-list:

[01] Checkmate Cardigan

[02] Garden Party Blazer

[03] Art School Drape Shirt

[04] Leopard Love Oversized Shirt

[05] Over Dyed Bead Crop

Gonna have to hope for a hella lotta shifts at work over Easter...my wardrobe will have to wait until then. 

Loving the idea of dressing for summer - pics on Tumblr of girls in shorts and crop tops is making me want sun, pronto. Summer is the season for casual dressing, which suits me and my ever-lacking ability to dress up. Definitely going to whack some tie-dye fun out and start customising vest tops - really love the bead detailing on the last image. Hurrrrry, summer!

10 Reasons

Anyone who has been graced with my presence (joke obv) in the last week or so will know that I have become exponentially closer to quitting uni...or closer to the mind-set of quitting, at least.
This term, or maybe this whole year in general, has resulted in my huge lack of motivation that has seen me spend far too much time doing everything but working. I know I'm not the only one feeling like this, which really gets me thinking - why the actual hell are we choosing to get into £25k+ dept for a course that we are getting no enjoyment out of?
I don't mean to seem like a massive emo but it's literally got to the point where I cannot stand it any more. Uni is supposed to be the time of my life, and although I enjoy the social side of my existence here, it's not enough. So that brings me to my fun-filled top 10 reasons why my course is pointless and hence my reasoning behind wanting to quit. Please enjoy without feeling the need to slit your wrists.

1. I currently have 9 hours of lectures/seminars a week, the majority of which are completely pointless and subsequently are spent with me asking myself why I bothered to turn up in the first place. 
2. I do not learn anything worthwhile. Ever. Everything I have taught myself in the last year and a half of being here has been courtesy of books and internet - not the teaching. So why exactly am I paying to teach myself? 
3. Doing a writing course is pointless in itself. My writing style hasn't exactly changed, I am writing at the same quality as I was in 6th form. In my opinion, 6th form was more difficult than uni, the workload was more extensive and the teaching so much better - all without having to pay £3000+ a year for it!
4. We are constantly told that it doesn't matter what we do in uni, it's what we do outside that really counts. To sum it up, what my lecturers are telling me is that I could've just applied for internships and work experience after 6th form, without going to uni, as this is what employers look for above all else. Great.
5. Along with this, we are constantly told that print journalism is dying a slow, painful death thanks to the not-so-fantastic world of online journalism and blogging. Therefore the jobs in the industry we were hoping to go into are disappearing - fast. 
6. I know it's all a part of adult life, but the idea of having to work your way upwards in your future job annoys me. I wouldn't be so worried if it didn't ring true for this field more than any other. Obviously I'm aware that I won't be writing for a mainstream consumer magazine straight after uni, but to think that thousands of other students will be looking for similar jobs after graduating (from better universities, might I add) is pretty disheartening. 
7. I don't particularly feel passionately about the fashion industry. I enjoy it - I buy into it (though not so much now I'm on a strict charity shop budget) - but I can't exactly see myself working in it. This was admittedly a misjudgement on my part. Should've just stuck to a bloody normal course afterall.
8. I no longer enjoy writing, full stop. Bad, bad sign. 
9. We always get told different ways of writing/pitching etc by different lecturers. They contradict one another to the point where I'm so confused that I just go ahead and do my own thing anyway.
10. The course in general could be described as disorganised, 'bitty' and...well, just a bit of a mess really. Our assignments often don't match up to what we've been 'taught' (at least for one of the units anyway). If there was a better structure then perhaps I'd know where I was for once.

I'm not sure what is keeping me here at the moment. Maybe the fact that I've paid for two years already and only have a year until I finish should be incentive enough. I just hope that next year is a bit better than this year has been; choosing my final year options last week was a push in the right direction for my waning motivation and positivity, but now I seem to have returned back to my previous depressive mind-set...oh, the joys o' uni.